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Sunday, May 19, 2019

Thankful; Not to be

Unless you live under a rock I'm sure you know who the Duggars are!  Society or at least social media can be so cruel. To the Duggar women -- those born into the family and those married into the family.

Scrolling through the Google news app on my phone and I stumbled upon an article about a wife of one of the Duggar men.  This article pointed out how the wife was 19 when she got married, has only been married for the last 20 months and are already expecting baby number 2. -- an issue she's too young.  Likewise, the eldest Duggar daughter is just under 30 and is often criticized for being single still, no husband, no children. Seriously, you can't have it both ways, people!

All of this makes me reflex on my own life and all I can say is thank God I wasn't in the public eye!

Married at 20; turn 21 later that year.
First baby 21; 14 months after marriage
Second baby at 22; 24 months after marriage.

Yes, that's right by the time I was 22 going on 23 I was celebrating 2 years of marriage and had 2 babies. That is only 1 year older than the Duggar wife I referenced above. I'm so thankful I was not in the public eye where I would have tons of people criticized me or make reference to my age. No one, at least not to my face, ever told me I was too young, was giving up my "childhood", or anything else by marrying so young and having 2 children so close together.

Even now as I'm approaching 40 with an 18-year-old, freshly graduated high school, and 17-year-old right behind him I'm not criticized for being a young mother or having the kids so close. I get things like it must be nice to be nearly done as if parenting magically ends when they turn 18. I get told things like it's nice they are close in age: they will be each other's friends as they grow old. I'm sure as the Duggar wives age and their families grow they will get similar responses, but it's awful to see so many so critical for them now.

I don't think I could have handled it well if my marriage, birth of my children, and other things were out in the public like that. I know in many ways that's the price they pay for being reality TV stars. I understand that. However, let's quit with the bashing and let them live their life the way they see it.
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